Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which said: "TWO PROSTITUTES — $50.00."

A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they'd either have to remove the sign or go to jail.


Just at that time, another car passed with a sign saying: "JESUS SAVES."

One of the girls asked the cop, "Why don't you stop them?!"

"Well, that's a little different," the cop smiled. "Their sign pertains to religion."


So the two ladies of the night frowned as they took their sign down and drove off.

The following day found the same cop in the area when he noticed the two ladies driving around with a large sign on their car again.

Figuring he had an easy bust, he began to catch up with them when he noticed the new sign which read:

This is the fourth set of high denomination notes to be issued this year, the first being in January when a 10 million dollar note was put into circulation. The next was on April 2 when a 50 million dollar note came into being before the 100 and 250 million dollar notes were introduced on May 2.


But,
How it can be useful? ? ?
We can't purchase even three packs of bread from it.


Zimbabwe has the worst inflation rate in the world. Almost 80% of the nation is unemployed. The Zimbabwean central bank has introduced $500 million bearer cheques (or currency notes) for the public, and $5 billion, $25 billion, $50 billion agro-cheques for farmers. Just last fortnight the nation had introduced $250 million bearer cheques.

A sausage sandwich sells for Zimbabwean $50 million. A 15-kg bag of potatoes cost Zimbabwean $260 million. But then, Zimbabwean $50 million is roughly equal to US$ 1!

• 1. People who ride on roller coaters have a higher chance of having a blood clot in the brain.


• 2. Black bears are not always black they can be brown, cinnamon, yellow and sometimes white.


• 3. People with blue eyes see better in dark.


• 4. Each year 30,000 people are seriously injured by exercise equipment.


• 5. The placement of a donkey’s eyes in its head enables it to see all four feet.


• 6. The sun is 330330 times larger than the earth.


• 7. The cow gives nearly 200000 glass of milk in her lifetime.


• 8. There are more female than male millionaires in the U.S.A.


• 9. A male baboon can kill a leopard.


• 10. When a person dies, hearing is usually the first sense to go.


• 11. Bill gates house was designed using Macintosh computer.


• 12. Nearly 22,000 cheques will be deducted from the wrong account over the next hour.


• 13. Almost all varieties of breakfast cereals are made from grass.


• 14. Some lions mates over 50 times a day.


• 15. American did not commonly use forks until after the civil war.


• 16. The most productive day of the week is Tuesday.


• 17. In the 1930’s America track star Jesse Owens used to race against horses and dogs to earn a living.


• 18. There’s a great mushroom in Oregon that is 2,400 years old. Covers 3.4 square miles of land and is still growing.


• 19. Jimmy Carter is the first U.S.A. president to have born in hospital.


• 20. Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.


• 21. Cleopatra married two of her brothers.


• 22. Human birth control pill work on gorillas.


• 23. The right lung takes in more air than the left.


• 24. It is illegal to own a red car in shanghai china.


• 25. A hard-boiled egg will spin. An uncooked or soft-boiled egg will not.


• 26. Astronauts cannot burp in space.


• 27. The snowiest city in the U.S.A. is blue canyon, California Lake Nicaragua in Nicaragua is the only fresh water lake in the world that has sharks.


• 28. Kite flying is a professional sport in Thailand.


• 29. The great warrior Genghis khan died in bed while having $ex.


• 30. No matter how cold it gets gasoline will not freeze.


• 31. SNAILS have 14175 teeth laid along 135 rows on their tongue.


• 32. A BUTTERFLY has 12,000 eyes.


• 33. DOLPHINS sleep with 1 eye open.


• 34. A BLUE WHALE can eat as much as 3 tones of food everyday, but at the same time can live without food for 6 months.


• 35. The EARTH has over 12,00,000 species of animals, 3,00,000 species of plants & 1,00,000 other species.


• 36. The fierce DINOSAUR was TYRANNOSAURS which has sixty long & sharp teeth, used to attack & eat other dinosaurs.


• 37. DEMETRIO was a mammal like REPTILE with a snail on its back. This acted as a radiator to cool the body of the animal.


• 38. CASSOWARY is one of the dangerous BIRD, that can kill a man or animal by tearing off with its dagger like claw.


• 39. The SWAN has over 25,000 feathers in its body.


• 40. OSTRICH eats pebbles to help digestion by grinding up the ingested food.


• 41. POLAR BEAR can look clumsy & slow but during chase on ice, can reach 25 miles / hr of speed.


• 42. KIWIS are the only birds, which hunt by sense of smell.


• 43. ELEPHANT teeth can weigh as much as 9 pounds.


• 44. OWL is the only bird, which can rotate its head to 270 degrees.


• 45. In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.


• 46. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.


• 47. The c!garette lighter was invented before the match.


• 48. Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different.


• 49. Tapeworms range in size from about 0.04 inch to more than 50 feet in length.


• 50. German Shepherds bite humans more than any other breed of dog.


• 51. A female mackerel lays about 500,000 eggs at one time.

Once upon a time a guy asked a girl
"Will you marry me?"
She said "No"_ _ _
And the guy lived happily ever after

The End

If a BARBER makes a mistakes, it's a
New style

If a DRIVER makes a mistakes, it is a
New Path

If an ENGINEER makes a mistake, it is a
New venture

If a POLITICIAN makes a mistake, it is a
New Law

If a SCIENTIST makes a mistake, it is a
New Invention

if a TAILOR makes a mistake, it is a
New Fashion

If a TEACHER makes a mistake, it is a
New Theory

If our BOSS makes a mistake, it is a
New Idea

If an EMPLOYEE makes a mistake, it is a


" Mistake "

Interviewer: what s ur qualification?
Sardarji : Sir I am Ph.d.

Interviewar : what do u mean by Ph.d?
Sardarji : (smiling) PASSED HIGHSCHOOL with DIFFICULTY.. .



~~~~~~~~~



A sardar for an exam had studied only one essay 'FRIEND', but in the exam the essay which came was 'FATHER' .

He replaced friend with father in the essay and>it read: AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF FATHERS,

SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUE FATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR.



~~~~~~~~~



A sardar on an interview 4 DA post detective.

Interviewer : who killed Gandhi?

Sardar : Thank u sir 4 giving me d job, I will start investigating. ......



~~~~~~~~~



2 sardarjis looking at Egyptian mummy.

Sar 1 : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.

Sar 2 : Aaho, lorry number is also written...BC 1760!!!....

MAGIC #1

Nobody can create a FOLDER anywhere on the computer which can be named as "CON".
This is something pretty cool...and unbelievable. ..
At Microsoft the whole Team, couldn't answer why this happened!
TRY IT NOW, IT WILL NOT CREATE "CON" FOLDER

MAGIC #2

This is something pretty cool and neat...and unbelievable. ..
At Microsoft the whole Team, including Bill Gates, couldn't answer why this happened!
Try it out yourself...
Open Microsoft Word and type
=rand (200, 99)
And then press ENTER

MAGIC #3

For those of you using Windows, do the following:
1. Open an empty notepad file
2. Type "Bush hid the facts" (without the quotes)
3. Save it as whatever you want.
4. Close it, and re-open it.
Is it just a really weird bug?
You can try the same thing above with another sentence "this app can break"



Explanation for Magic #1:

In windows the folder name and the special system variables share the same interface, so when you create a folder with a system variable name it will consider that folder already exist!!
These special system variables are available irrespective of path
You cannot create a folder with these names also:
CON, NUL, COM1, COM2, COM3, LPT1, LPT2, LPT3,COM1 to COM9 and LPT1 to LPT9....
CON means console, COM1 means serial port 1, LPT1 means parallel port 1

When u r in light, everything will follow u. But when u enter dark, even your own shadow will not follow u that is life

God made relatives. Thank God we can choose our friends

Money glitters, beauty sparkles, and intelligence shines.

Keep a very firm grasp on reality, so you can strangle it at any time.

Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're getting.

People may not always believe what you say, but they will believe what you do.

I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.

You can't have everything - where would you put it?

Laugh and the world ignore you. Crying doesn't help either.

God is not moved or impressed with our worship until our hearts are moved and impressed by Him.

Life is like a mirror, if you frown at it, it frowns back; if you smile, it returns the greeting.

Never trust a person who isn't having at least one crisis.

Goodness is the only investment that never fails.

The only thing lazy people do fast is get tired.

Never deprive someone of hope; it may be all they have.

Silence is the only thing that can't be misquoted!

If we don't control our money, it will control us.

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die rich..

Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

If you r living on the edge, make sure you're wearing your seat belt.

A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

Minds, like parachutes, only function when they are open.

The shortest distance between two points is under construction.

Learn from other people's mistakes, life isn't long enough to make them all yourself.

On the road, never argue with a vehicle heavier than yours.

One thing you can give and still keep is your word.

Life is funny if you don't think about it.

Life is like a grammar lesson. You find the past perfect and the present tense.

There are two kinds of lawyers, those who know the law and those who know the judge.

More doors are opened with 'please' than with keys.

This is the story of., "The Perfect Boss"

There were about 70 scientists working on a very hectic

project. All of them were really frustrated due to the pressure of work
and the demands of their boss but everyone were loyal to him and did not
think of quitting the job.

One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him -
Sir, I have promised to my children that I will take them to the
exhibition going on in our township. So I want to leave the office at 5:30
pm.

His boss replied "OK, You're permitted to leave the office early today" .



The Scientist started working. He continued his work after
lunch. As usual he got involved to such an extent that he looked athis
watch when he felt he was close to completion. The time was 8.30 PM.

Suddenly he remembered of the promise he had given to his children.

He looked for his boss, he was not there. Having told him in
the morning itself, he closed everything and left for home.
Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having
disappointed his children. He reached home. Children were not
there.


His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines.
The situation was explosive; any talk would boomerang on
him. His wife asked him, "Would you like to have coffee or shall I
straight away serve dinner if you are hungry.

The man replied "If you would like to have coffee, i too
will have but what about Children?"


Wife replied "You don't know? Your manager came here at 5.15
PM and has taken the children to the exhibition "



What had really happened was ... The boss who granted him
permission was observing him working seriously at 5.00 PM . He thought to
himself,
this person will not leave the work, but if he has promised his children
they should enjoy the visit to exhibition.

So he took the lead in taking them to exhibition.
The boss does not have to do it everytime. But once it is
done, loyalty is established.

That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work
under their boss even though the stress was tremendous.
By the way, can you hazard a guess as to who the boss was..?

He was none other than the mastermind behind India 's
successful nuclear weapons and missiles program.

*Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, President of India.*

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, it will take just five minutes.
Patient: And how much will it cost?
Dentist: It's $99.
Patient: $99 for just a few minutes work???
Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.



~~~~~~~~~



A new client meets a famous lawyer.

Client: Can you tell me how much do you charge?
Lawyer: I charge $200 to answer three questions!

Client: Well that's a bit steep, isn't it?
Lawyer: Yes it is, and what's your third question?



~~~~~~~~~



The Difference Between Dogs and Cats



A dog thinks: My owners feed me, love me, provide me with a nice house, and take good care of me ... They must be gods!

A cat thinks: My owners feed me, love me, provide me with a nice house and take good care of me ... I must be a god!



~~~~~~~~~

A young woman who was worried about her habit of biting her fingernails was advised by a friend to take up yoga. She did, and soon her fingernails were growing normally.

Seeing this, her friend congratulated her and said yoga had totally cured her nervousness. "No," she replied, "but now I can reach my toe-nails so I bite them instead.

~~~~~~~~~

Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.

~~~~~~

Customer :Waiter, do you serve crabs?
Waiter :Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.

~~~~~~

Customer:Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter:Can't you tell the difference by taste?
Customer:No, I can't.
Waiter:Then does it really matter?

~~~~~~

Customer:Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter:Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.

~~~~~~

Customer:Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter:That' s all right sir, he won't drink much.

~~~~~~

Waiter: I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer: Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.

~~~~~~~~~

Customer:Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter: So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?

~~~~~~~

Customer :Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up?
Waiter :I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.

~~~~~~~~

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born.

~~~~~~~~~

Customer:Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter: Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?

Do u know ?

Adidas
When the founders of the German sports shoe business ‘Dassler Brothers’ went their separate ways in 1949, no one would have guessed that they would start two of the biggest global brands of the century. Rudolph founded Puma, while Adolph started Adidas — a combination of his nickname, Adi, and the start of his last name. The famous three stripes were introduced to the shoes in 1949.

BATA
Bata was established on August 24, 1894 in Zlin, Czechoslovakia by Tomas Bata. The company first established itself in India in 1931 and commenced manufacturing shoes in Batanagar in 1936. The Batanagar factory is the first Indian shoe manufacturing unit to receive the ISO 9001 certification in 1993.

Porsche
In 1931, Ferdinand Porsche founded the Porsche Engineering Office in Stuttgart. Porsche’s production operations are housed in a collection of established buildings on a mixed industrial estate in Stuttgart-Zuffenhau sen. The Carrera GT and the Cayenne models are produced at the Porsche factory in Leipzig. In 1944, the engineering arm was moved from Stuttgart.

Nike
Bill Bowerman, the legendary University of Oregon track & field coach, and Phil Knight, a University of Oregon business student and middle-distance runner under Bowerman, founded Nike. Nike, when it came into being in 1962, was known as Blue Ribbon Sports. Its first-year sales totaled $8,000. In 1972, BRS changed its name to Nike, named for the Greek winged goddess of victory.

Reebok
In the 1890s, Joseph William Foster made some of the first known running shoes with spikes in them. By 1895, he was in business making shoes by hand for top runners; and before long his fledgling company, J.W. Foster and Sons, developed an international clientele of distinguished athletes. The family-owned business made the running shoes worn in the 1924 Summer Games by the athletes celebrated in the film Chariots of Fire. In 1958, two of the founder’s grandsons started a companion company that came to be known as Reebok, named after an African gazelle.

Sun Microsystems
The correct answer is Stanford University Network. In 1981, Bavarian-born Andreas Bechtolsheim was licensing rights to a computer he designed. Named Sun for Stanford University Network and using off-the-shelf parts, it was an affordable workstation for engineers and scientists. In that year, he met Vinod Khosla, who convinced him to form a company and expand. Khosla, Bechtolsheim and Scott McNeally, all Stanford MBAs, founded Sun in 1982.

HMV Dog
Nipper the dog was born in Bristol in Gloucester, England in 1884 and was so named because of his tendency to nip at visitors’ legs. When his first master Mark Barraud died in Bristol in 1887, Nipper was taken to Liverpool in Lancashire, England by Mark’s younger brother Francis, a painter. In Liverpool Nipper discovered the Phonograph, a cylinder recording and playing machine and Francis Barraud ‘often noticed how puzzled he was to make out where the voice came from.’ Three years after Nipper died Francis committed that memory to canvas.

GM
General Motors Corp the world’s largest vehicle manufacturer, employs about 325,000 people globally. Founded in 1908, GM has been the global automotive sales leader since 1931. GM today has manufacturing operations in 32 countries and its vehicles are sold in 192 countries. In 2003, GM sold nearly 8.6 million cars and trucks, about 15 percent of the global vehicle market. GM’s global headquarters are at the GM Renaissance Center in Detroit. The GM Group of global partners includes Fiat Auto SpA of Italy, Fuji Heavy Industries Ltd., Isuzu Motors Ltd. and Suzuki Motor Corp. of Japan, which are involved in various product, powertrain and purchasing collaborations. In addition, GM is the largest shareholder in GM Daewoo Auto & Technology Co. of South Korea. GM also has technology collaborations with BMW AG of Germany.

TCS
TCS was founded in 1968 as an internal arm of the Tata conglomerate. The company — which has locations in 32 countries — employed some 30,000 workers at the end of 2003. Fakir Chand Kohli, former deputy chairman of Tata Consultancy Services, is universally regarded as the father of the Indian software industry. He has been instrumental in scripting the success story of company. Kohli has been awarded the Padma Bhushan, one of India’s highest civilian honours, for his contribution to the Indian software industry. Kohli currently serves on the TCS’ executive committee.

Mont Blanc
Mont Blanc has been known for generations as the maker of the best writing instruments the world has known. The German company, over the last couple of years, has expanded its range to include writing accessories, luxury leather goods and belts, jewellery items and even eye wear and watches. In India, the company is represented by Entrack, owned by former Test cricketer Dilip Doshi. Entrack is the sole distributor of Mont Blanc pens and has exclusive outlets in top five cities in India. The correct answer is Simplo FillerPen Company.
The company was originally called Simplo FillerPen Company. The company expanded its presence to Paris, London, and Barcelona three years after it was founded and was present in most of the fashionable capitals of Europe. In 1934, the company’s name was changed to Mont Blanc Simplo GmbH, after the tallest peak in Europe. Three Germans founded the company in 1906 — Hamburg-based stationer Claus-Johannes Voss, Hamburg banker Christian Lausen and a Berlin engineer Wilhelm Dziambor. The company’s international headquarter is in Hamburg.

DURACELL
The story of Duracell begins in the early 1920’s with an inventive scientist named Samuel Ruben and an eager manufacturer of tungsten filament wire named Philip Rogers Mallory. Duracell is the world’s leading manufacturer and marketer of high-performance alkaline batteries. Duracell also markets primary lithium and zinc air batteries as well as rechargeable nickel-metal hydride batteries.

Air Deccan
Bangalore-based Air Deccan has struck a deal with R K Laxman, India’s most famous cartoonist, to use his legendary ‘Common Man’ character as the airline’s mascot. The mascot exemplifies the fact that air fares are so low now that air travel is no longer the privilege of the elite few but is very much within the reach of the ‘common people

A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses' wife instead:

"I'm afraid he died last week." she explains.


The next day the man calls again and asks for the boss.

"I told you" the wife replies, "he died last week."



The next day he calls again and once more asks to speak to his boss. By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts:

"I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK! WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING?"

"Coz . . ." he replied laughing, "I just love hearing it. . . ."

A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee.....

On his first day, he dialled the kitchen and shouted into the phone:

"Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!"

The voice from the other side responded:

"You fool; you've dialled the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to?"

"No" replied the trainee.

"It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!"

The trainee shouted back:

"And do you know who YOU are talking to, you IDIOT?"

"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.

"Thank God!" replied the trainee and put the phone down.....


************ ********* ********* *******

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

GAUTENG:
When you rearrange the letters:
GET A GUN


THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letter:
TWELVE PLUS ONE


MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

Very very Impressive Questions and Answers..... ...

Question 1: What will you do if I run away with your sister?"

The candidate who was selected answered " I will not get a better match for my sister than you sir"


Question 2: Interviewer (to a student girl candidate) - What is one morning you woke up & found that you were pregnant.

Girl - I will be very excited and take an off, to celebrate with my husband.

Normally an unmarried girl will be shocked to hear this, but she managed it well. Why I should think it in the wrong way, she said later when asked



Question 3: You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night,
it's raining heavily, when suddenly you pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for a bus:


An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
An old friend who once saved your life.
The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.


Which one would you choose to offer a ride to,
knowing very well that there could only be one passenger in your car?


This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.


* You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first;

* or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to ! pay him back.

* However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.


The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer. Guess what was his answer?


He simply answered:


"I would give the car keys to my Old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital.
I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams."


Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations. Never forget to "Think Outside the Box."


Question 4: Interviewer: He ordered a cup of coffee for the candidate.
Coffee arrived kept before the candidate, then he asked what is before you?

Candidate: Instantly replied "Tea"

He got selected.

You know how and why did he say "TEA" when he knows very well that coffee was kept before.

(Answer: The question was "What is before you (U - alphabet)
Reply was "TEA" ( T - alphabet)

Alphabet "T" was before Alphabet "U"


Question 5: Where Lord Rama would have celebrated his "First Diwali"?
People will start thinking of Ayodya, Mitila [Janaki's place], Lanka etc...


But the logic is, Diwali was a celebrated as a mark of Lord Krishna Killing Narakasura.
In Dusavataar, Krishnavathaar comes after Raamavathaar.


So, Lord Rama would not have celebrated the Diwali At all!



Question 6: The interviewer asked to the candidate "This is your last question of the interview.
Please tell me the exact position of the center of this table where u have kept your files."


Candidate confidently put one of his finger at some point at the table and told that this was the central point at the table.
Interviewer asked how did u get to know that this being the central point of this table,
then he answers quickly that sir u r not likely to ask any more question, as it was the last question that u promised to ask.....


And hence, he was selected as because of his quick-wittedness. ........


This is What Interviewer expects from the Interviewee. ....
Show/Hide Text

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321
1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111
9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888
Brilliant, isn't it?
And look at this symmetry:
1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321

1
Long back,
a person who sacrificed his sleep,
forgot his family,
forgot his food,
fogot laughter were called
"Saints"

But now they are called..

" IT professionals "


2
An interesting line written at the back of a Biker's T Shirt:

" If you are able to see this, Please tell me that my galfriend has fallen off "


3
Most Relationships fail not because of the absence of love..
Love is always present..
Its just that,
One loves too much,
and

The other loves too many,


4.
Employee: Boss, Now i have got married..! Please increase my salary..!

BOSS: Factory is not responsible for accidents occuring outside the company..!


5. (Tooooooooo gud!)
Philosophy of life
At the begining of married life, every gal treats her husband as GOD,
Later on somehow the alphabets got reversed ..!


6.
What is a Fear?
Fear is the Deep, Wrenching feeling in your stomach
When pages of your book still smell new

and

Just few hours left for your exams..!


7.
Jus4Fun
Someone has rightly said, "A fool can ask More questions that a wise man cannot answer"

No Wonder why so many of us speechless when lecturers ask question..!


8.
Girl: Do you have Cards with sentimental Love quotes?

Shopkeeper: Oh sure..@! How about this card, it says "To the only boy I ever loved.!"

Girl: Thats good, Give me 12 of them ..!


9
After reading the form filled by an applicant.. The employer said: " WE do have an opening for you..!

Applicant: What is it?

Interviewer: Its called the "door..!"


10
A Banner cum Sign Board In front of an IT company..

Drive Slowly, Dont kill our Employees...

Show/Hide Text

- A man will pay $2.00 for a $1.00 item he needs.

- A woman will pay $1.00 for a $2.00 item that she does not need.


- A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

- A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.


- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

- A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


- To be happy with a man, you must love him a little and understand him a lot.

- To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.


- Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

- Women somehow deteriorate overnight.


- A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

- A man marries a woman expecting she won't change, but she does.


- Married men live longer than single men, but married men are more willing to die.

- Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.


- A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument

What is the difference between girls aged:
8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68?

At 8 - You take her to bed and tell her a story.

At 18 - You tell her a story and take her to bed.

At 28 - You don’t need to tell her a story to take her to bed.

At 38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed.

At 48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed.

At 58 - You stay in bed to avoid her story.

At 68 - If you take her to bed, that’ll be a story!!

Dear Bo$$

In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company.
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.

Your$ $incerely,



The next day, the employee recieved this letter of reply:


Dear,
I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticeably well as yet.

NOw the newspaper are saying the world`s leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad.

I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean.
Show/Hide Text

Fine

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

***********

Five Minutes

If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour.

Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

***********

Nothing

This is the calm before the storm. This means "something" and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually end in "fine".

***********

Go Ahead

This is a dare, not permission, DON'T DO IT!

***********

Loud Sigh

Although not actually a word, the loud sigh is
often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

***********

That's Okay

This is one of the most dangerous statements that woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

***********

Thanks

This is the least used of all words in the female vocabulary. If a woman is thanking you. Do not question it, just say you're welcome and back out of the room slowly.
Show/Hide More

A Toilet is like a committee meeting.

People come with lot of pressure, sit, create a lot of noise, and ultimately DROP THE MATTER.

Boss said to secretary: For a week we will go abroad,
so make arrangement.

Secretary make call to Husband: For a week my boss and
I will be going abroad, you look after yourself.

Husband make call to secret lover: My wife is going
abroad for a week, so lets spend the week together.

Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving
private tution: I have work for a week, so you need
not come for class.

Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, for a
week I don't have class 'coz my teacher is busy. Lets
spend the week together.

Grandpa(the 1st boss ;) ) make call to his secretary: This week I am
spending my time with my grandson. We cannot attend
that meeting.

Secretary make call to her husband: This week my boss
has some work, we cancelled our trip.

Husband make call to secret lover: We cannot spend
this week together, my wife has cancelled her trip.

Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving
private tution: This week we will have class as usual.

Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, my
teacher said this week I have to attend class. Sorry I
can't give you company.

Grandpa(boss) make call to his secretary: Don't worry this
Week we will attend that meeting, so make arrangement.
Show/Hide Text

Show/Hide More

Show/Hide More

Show/Hide More

At last it would be desirable always something Thailand is known as the country of transvestites. What for men decide to change a floor, to tell very difficultly. Someone since the childhood at another's will gets in a cabaret, someone since a birth feels the girl. But nevertheless the main reason of mass transformation from « monsters in a beauty » consists in the eternal poor pursuing men all life. In particular it is a question of resorts where it is possible to earn only on tourists or on selling love



Therefore we have decided to go by all means on the most well-known show of transvestites on Phuket - Simon Cabaret.


Place, it is necessary to tell, unusual: here boys are madly similar to women, and men personify unearthly beauty and grace...


To do photos during show constraining forbid, the penalty sounds at all on-?????? - 50 000 dollars. Hardly someone from tourists has such round sum at itself, therefore all photosession passed extremely after show under supervision of local protection


Everyone wishing to embody itself on a background of several lady-boys the equivalent of 500 roubles paid for a photo


Thus "girls" managed not bad to receive and on tea...


... Falling asleep visitors compliments. These Thai ex-men, apparently, have deserved the right to refer to as the present women...


On some photographs very difficultly to distinguish the transvestite from the present Thai lady. At times it seems, that all is perfect to the contrary...



The breast at lady-boy, certainly, does not impress with the sizes. But to show the advantage they try at each opportunity. ..


But that the sight does not captivate how them in a female way the naive look and skill « to shoot eyes ». women already it for a long time it is not given


Though at times they go to far


It is necessary and to mention a star of a local cabaret, Ms Kissy. Small and very flexible girl has won all an applause during representation


In a word, they are very lovely. Riveting attention of men, they do not cause in an opposite floor a drop of hatred or disgust. Still they like to put on beautifully. ..


... Love men, as unique means of the income. But thus their love is pleasant and truthful, start up even for a short while...


These peoples like to rivet attention of associates. At them not bad it turns out....


The figure was has men any lady can envy


Art, true gurus - in hands...


But the most important - they are able above themselves show have taken part the three men who have represented parodies to transvestites


They such different, but nevertheless together... Has whistled a signal - and all is time for the work, the new party of tourists requires show!

Besides special shows to meet the transvestite on Phuket simply. Practically similar performances, and roads of the area Patong well-known for a night life are included in the program of each hotel and at all overflown lady-boys. Probably, nevertheless greater danger in Thailand pursues men, instead of women as much can consider. In fact not was the man has everyone money to make to itself all number of operations for transformation into the present lady. Present the person of the man, got on a fishing tackle newly appeared
Show/Hide More